I feel like I'm getting a good cadence of blogging once a week. Do I wish I could be the type of person to blog more? Yes, but I'm just not that interesting.
After the travel woes last week we DID in fact go camping - and then our train was cancelled coming home. Can I catch a break with this stuff? But it was a beautiful time - so much sky - and the weather was perfect. In the distance at night we could see the lights from a random New Jersey city, no idea which one, and it was so far away that it felt insignificant. We were alone the whole time too, which is a feeling you never have in the city. Just three people came through, all day hikers, while we sat in our camp chairs on a rock and read and sat and thought. It was just what I needed.
Every time I go camping I struggle to shake the feeling I should be doing something else. We always say hey, maybe we should go back early so we can catch up on things/have the time to run errands/whatever else. For a few hours we are bored. But then it eases into something quiet and valuable, times just sitting or reading for a good long time, or even playing our handhelds until our eyes are bleary. And then there is still hours left to the day. It's amazing how much time you lose when you're surrounded by distractions. So I'm glad in the end that we went, and I'm especially glad that we stayed (for two nights!).
But now it's hot again, and work is so busy. I had a terrible dream last night about having to choose who would die in what order from a lineup. Actually, I've been having a lot of dreams - actually most of them are nightmares - but for some reason I don't wake up upset, just wishing I could finish it out and have some resolution. I'm working on a new game and it is kicking my butt harder than anything I've ever made before. I'm trying to tell myself, it's okay to not get things FINISHED as long as I'm making progress. Sometimes the progress feels like going backward. But at the end of the day it's all progress. At least, that's what I'm telling myself so I don't panic give up (again).